


Trial and Error

by Anonymous



Category: Newsies (1992), Newsies - All Media Types, Newsies!: the Musical - Fierstein/Menken
Genre: Canon Era, Experimental Style, Falling In Love, M/M, No Dialogue, One Shot, POV Second Person, Temporarily Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-21
Updated: 2019-02-21
Packaged: 2019-11-01 12:57:17
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 630
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17867687
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/
Summary: Race doesn't know what he wants (or does he?)





	Trial and Error

It starts like this.

Two boys, one favor, a lifetime of choices.

You owed him, it was only fair. Except, you didn’t plan on him falling face first. To jump into this unknown. All you had done was look out for him.

You weren’t ready, you’re not sure you ever will be and still, you cross the bridge. 

Each and every day you’re down at the races, selling and betting. Sometimes he’s there, other times, he makes you come find him. 

Not that you mind anymore. Your heart skips a beat when he sees you, his eyes lighting up as if you’re the best thing he’s seen all day. Somehow, in his own special way, he keeps his smile down. You wish you could do the same. 

One night, as you sit on the ledge of the fire escape together, he asks. It feels like a business proposition by his tone, but you notice how his eyes refuse to meet yours, the slight shake in his hands. With a sigh, you try to explain yourself, the words crashing together in your mind, your mouth running a mile a minute. 

You don’t know if you feel the same.

He nods. If he’s hurt, you’re none the wiser. Something compels you to say more, to give him a sliver of hope and so, you do. 

The evening ends with you sharing his bed, both of you as far from each other as possible. When morning comes, you leave without a word, finding it better this way. 

For the first time in a long while, you don’t place your bets. Days pass, but you need to figure things out on your own first. If this is what you really want or if it’s just something you’ll play with until you get bored.

The thing is, you could never be bored of him. You know this and so does he. It’s as if he has an invisible line tied to you. When he tugs, you follow. 

That doesn’t explain why you’re so scared. So hesitant to take this as far as he wishes this to go. Watching your friends together, the envy grows within you. How secure and happy they look. That they know exactly what they want with each other. 

If only your mind could do the same. 

It’s dark when you walk down the dusty streets, your mind colliding with your heart. Before you realize it, you’re staring at the water far below you, your breaths catching in your throat. 

You undoubtedly love him. Why you’re depriving yourself, you have no idea, and you force yourself the rest of the way. 

Climbing up to Spot’s window, you tap on it, hoping he might hear you. When it flies open, you can’t help but grin and you think you see a smile beginning to grace his face. After helping you inside, he holds onto your arms as you stand in the dark room together and you tell him why you’ve been gone for so long. 

One step at a time, that’s all you ask.

In his relief, he hugs you tight and you think to yourself how this is home. Blushing at that thought, you’re thankful for the lack of light, mumbling the last few reassurances that this isn’t just for fun. 

He understands, doesn’t push, and he takes a step back, letting you decide. 

With your heart beating wildly in your chest, you take one of his hands in your own and squeeze. You’re both young, still have years ahead. That’s more than enough time to talk and learn and grow. 

As you reach to touch his face, his head tilts, meeting your hand and you find comfort in knowing that he’ll stay by your side no matter what becomes of this.

**Author's Note:**

> yeah uh i have no excuses for my absence ;;;;; 
> 
> i hope you all are well tho
> 
> [Rumblr](http://safarikalamari.tumblr.com)


End file.
